Some men can be extremely shy and secretive by nature. And these qualities can drive some of us up the wall! You might not understand why he feels this way but you still need to work towards building that trust in him. Here are 10 simple ways you can actually make your guy open up to you!
1. Start with talking about yourself
Begin with an experience that you’ve had, something emotional and maybe even a bit touchy. This way, once he sees that you’re okay being vulnerable in front of him, he might just relax himself. In fact, some of your stories might just remind him of similar things that would’ve happened to him in the past.
2. Discover a common interest
The more he sees you two have in common, the more he will ease into talking to you about things that really matter to him. And once you have a common ground, the two of you will have a better emotional connection as well.
3. Ask him follow-up questions
Sometimes, he might let something slip. Like how he used to love doing something as a child or his favourite vacation destination. Ask him questions around these topics that make him want to speak more. However, make sure these questions aren’t too aggressive because that might just make him more defensive.
4. Don’t push it
Don’t keep nagging him about how he never tells you anything. That’s not going to lead you anywhere. In fact, it will just negatively affect how he feels about you. So relax and be patient, if he loves you, he’ll open up…just give him time.
5. Understand him
What men fear most is not being understood. He might tell you something but if you fail to see his point of view, it’s a huge discouragement for similar future discussions. So just try to understand what he’s saying, why he might have done things the way he did even when they don’t match up to your expectations.
6. Let him know you’re around
Even when he doesn’t want to share something with you at that moment, let him know that you will be around for whenever he feels he can. Make him understand that you’re in it for the long run and ready to wait.
7. Share opinions moderately
Though you might feel like it’s a great idea to share your opinions with him, no matter how aggressive, it might not do you much good. If he is the shy kind, aggressive opinions can push him more and more into his shell. So, no, don’t stop stating your opinion but make sure you don’t go overboard and give him a chance to express himself as well.
8. Talk about his favourite things
Engaging over lighter topics that your guy likes, like his favourite game or book, is a much more strategic way to get him talking more. This reinforces the fact that you’re just having a conversation with him and not interrogating or pushing him.
9. Do something relaxing together
Go for a short weekend trip or just get some coffee together. Do things to break away from the day-to-day grind. Once he is in a relaxed mood, he’ll feel more open to discussing things with you.
10. Remember things and ask him about them later
Sometimes, when you don’t feel it is the right time to discuss something with him then just store it in your memory for a later time. Ask him later very casually about it, like – ‘Hey, remember that thing we talked about, so what do you think about it now?’ – this would also serve as a great conversation starter.
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