60 Thoughts I Had While Watching ‘Stree’ & I’m So Happily Scared After The Mad Ride

I just watched Rajkummar Rao and Shraddha Kapoor starrer Stree and I must say that I am impressed. I did not have too many expectations from the film. Ayushmann Khurrana’s brother Aparshakti (Bittu) and Abhishek Banerjee (Jaana), who play Rajkummar’s (Vicky) best friends, had remarkable comic timing. And Pankaj Tripathi, of course, was the cherry on the cake. With the perfect punches, gripping storyline and spooky background music, the film had my undivided attention. 

These are all the thoughts I had while watching the film. Read on!

1. This is such a scary place. It’s so dark. Why do all horror movies start like this?

2. Of course, this guy will enter that forbidden place. Remember the case of the forbidden fruit.

3. She won’t let him pee. She’s calling out his name with so much love. 

4. Don’t turn around. It’s a trap.

5. And he’s gone. She left his clothes behind. Does she want naked men? Oh…

6. Rajkummar Rao enters. *Hoots* His name is Vicky and he’s a tailor. Why am I not that lucky?

7. Smoking while jogging? Not sure who came up with this bizarre idea.

8. Why do these houses have Oh Stree Kal Aana written in red paint? Oh! It is special, guys! It’s made of bat blood mixed with bat pee.

9. Vicky is the coolest tailor ever. He can take measurements by looking at women. No need for inches tape. India’s Got Talent.

10. Shraddha Kapoor enters. WHY?

11. When will she learn to emote? Why does she appear like she’s the ghost?

12. Is that how you talk to someone you’ve just met? She just felt up his hand and said, “Vicky Please.”

13. Best friends Aparshakti Khurrana (Bittu) and Abhishek Banerjee (Jaana) have crazy comebacks.

14. I want friends with such an AMAZING sense of humour, too.

15. Guys have to urinate publicly to show they’re having fun and doing ‘matargashti’.

16. She’s already Bhabhiji to the sidekicks!

17. She loves to hang out at night only. 

18. FUCK! I just jumped onto the person sitting right next to me. Impeccable direction and on point background music. I am so scared right now.

19. Pankaj Tripathi is AWESOME.

20. She’s here. She’s here. She’s here. Oops! False alarm.

21. Can someone fast forward this Nora Fatehi song? I couldn’t even watch it when it was released.

22. Did Vicky just pee on the Oh Stree kal aana board?

23. Don’t open the door. Don’t!

24. Told you not to open the door. You little rebel.

25. Saamaan nahi toh friendship nahi. (No condoms, no sex)

26. The sex talk with dad. *Awkward* 

27. Swayam Sevi Bano. If you know what they mean. *wink*

28. It was NOT a love letter. She already has demands. I never liked her in the first frame itself.

29. Why does she say such eerie things? She’s creeping out poor Vicky.

30. Every time she puts her hand on his, he falls for it. #Testosterone

31. Why is he going after her in the jungle? She’s not worth it, buddy!

32. And Vicky has amazing monologue skills.

33. What’s with her giving him the ‘look’. And now she has disappeared.

34. I knew she’d come for Jaana.

35. She’s playing mind games with him. I’m more scared than he is.

36. Don’t turn, PLEASE don’t turn.

37. She’s right behind him.

38. I saw her. Oh shit. She’s SCARY.

39. He’s the best boy, don’t take him away.

40. She left his clothes and underwear behind.

41. Aparshakti Khurranna is killin’ it. I am laughing too loud.

42. INTERMISSION

43. “Thodi personal baat poochein? Personally mar lena.” Only if someone like Vicky asked me this. I’d never take offence.

44. I can’t stop laughing.

45. Now, I’m scared again.

46. Background story time. She wants love and respect? Then why does she strip the men down before taking them with her?

47. They’ve entered her cave to find Jaana.

48. Vicky’s making that face, something is happening to him. Oh, he was about to sneeze.

49. Don’t split up, guys. United we stand, divided we fall.

50. And she’s behind Vicky. Obviously! He’s the cutest and funniest.

51. He’s clicking a selfie with her?

52. And he’s gone?! No!

53. Enter Vijay Raaz. THE BEST SURPRISE EVER.

54. He’s a misogynist but he has a solution.

55. Vicky will be the saviour of the town. Yay! He’s found his calling.

56. They’ve decoded the witch. She is literate, but has low IQ and is dumb.

57. All men clad in sarees? Isn’t that a delight.

58. They have a plan ready to kill her. But how can you kill a witch? 

59. And Shraddha had to say “Vicky please” before leaving. Why doesn’t she give her digits to him?

60. Oh Stree, Raksha Karna! 

After Akshay Kumar’s Bhool Bhulaiyaa, Stree is the second film that will make laugh and at the same time shit in your pants. It’s a must-watch!

I’d give the movie 4 out of 5 stars and I’ve made a promise to my editor that I’ll pay for her tickets if she doesn’t like it. Watch it this weekend!

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