#IDo: Here Are Some New Year's Resolutions To Make With Your Husband In 2020!

2019 is almost over! It’s finally that time of the year when everybody makes resolutions that they plan to follow through the new year. This time, do something different and make New Year resolutions with your spouse! Keeping them with your husband or wife will not only be fun, but it’ll also be a great exercise in relationship building and strengthening. And if these promises help you get the spark back into your marriage, then they will be totally worth it. After all, don’t we all want to be the coolest couple and total #goals? So here is a list of New Year’s Resolutions 2020 to keep your relationship rockin’ all year long! 

New Year’s Resolutions Ideas 
Romantic Promises    
Vows To Make     
Make A Career Pact   
Unique New Year’s Resolutions     
Ways To Stick To Your Resolution 

The Origin Of New Year’s Resolutions

New Year’s resolutions aren’t just something our parents or grandparents came up with to force us to lose weight, work harder or in general, lead a better life. In fact, you’re taking part in a custom that is older than what you can imagine. The origin of this custom of New Year resolutions can be traced back to almost 4,000 years ago to the Babylonians. In those times, the Babylonians rang in the new year with a two week long festival in March in which they made promises to gods in hopes of earning food favours from them in the coming year.

Roman emperor Julius Caesar moved the first day of the year to January 1, as a mark of respect to Janus, the Roman god of new beginnings. The first day of the new year became a day of oath-taking, temple sacrifices and social activities.

Over time, the resolutions evolved and became more about self and less about society once the empires began moving from wars to peace. As people realised the importance of self-fulfillment and self-improvement, the modern tradition of New Year resolutions began which helped people become better versions of themselves and contribute more, in a personal capacity, to the society.

Quite the history lesson, wasn’t this? Well, you learn something new every day!

Why Are They Important For Couples?

As time passes, complacency seems to set into relationships, especially marriage. It’s not a conscious decision but most people do end up taking their partners for granted. This leads to reduced communication and increased distance between partners. That’s exactly what makes New Year resolutions so important for couples.

Bring You Two Closer:

Like I said, over time, life tends to catch up with us and a lot of couples tend to drift apart under the pressure of responsibilities and work. But making resolutions will force you two to make more time for each other and it’ll bring you closer like you were in the initial days. 

You’ll Start Communicating Better:

As you two spend more time together and indulge in activities together, you’ll start to understand one another better. New Year’s resolutions ideas like sharing your feeling with the other one in times of distress instead of shutting off to the world or coming to each other for solutions will have you two communicating better. And as they say, communication is key, even to a good relationship.

Help In Recommitment

The term “recommitment”, in this case, can be defined as the conscious intention to choose a new and more loving path with your partner in the coming year. Both of you are about to enter into a transformative process where both partners want to be better than they’ve been before in every way they can.

Reignite The Spark:

A New Year’s resolution that involves undertaking a new activity together like joining a dance class or a gym will definitely increase the intimacy in your relationship. You could even resolve to try new things in bed!

Change Things That Aren’t Working:

New year resolutions force people to take stock of their life and evaluate what’s working and what’s not. That’s what this will do for couples as well – it’ll force you to introspect and find out what’s holding your relationship back and stopping you two from growing together. 

Force You To Prioritise Each Other:

With kids, families and career, sometimes your partner becomes less of a priority. By making some promises you plan to see through, you actually make them a priority again and put them in their rightful place in your life – at the top! 

You’ll Bond Better With Each Other’s Families Too:

In this article, we’ve included little promises you can make to each other’s family, friends and loved ones. All these are things that would require minimal effort but will help you get closer to them and live like one big, happy family! 

New Year’s Resolutions Ideas And Examples For 2020

While every couple comes up with their own promises, here are some New Year’s resolution examples that’ll help you come up with your own.

Romantic Promises To Each Other

• Pick a date night and stick to it: There is a possibility that you may not have spent time with each other as much as you wanted this past year, thanks to all the work and added responsibilities. But make it a point to pick a night for just the two of you and try your level best to stick to it. It’ll also remind you of your courtship days, and reliving those moments will be so much fun. Resolution number 1 sorted!
  
• Be the ‘It’ couple on the block: Your couple resolutions are incomplete without this one! You’ve got to be THE couple, I’m telling you! You shouldn’t be able to keep your hands off each other and make the other feel more desired and keep the spark alive.
• Try new things in bed more often: Yeah, it’s really not like you need to be bound by a resolution to try new sexy stuff, but hey, it doesn’t hurt to put it down clearly at the beginning of the year itself! Just let go of your inhibitions and have some fun!
• Enjoy some alone time with each other, even when everybody is at home: After you’re done spending some time with the fam, just sneak out and cuddle in bed? Or, you could also slip into the stairway or kitchen. Thrillin’ right? We don’t really need a resolution for this, but still, you know. Better safe than sorry! *wink*
• Solve a fight before going to bed: This should have been the first point in this list of resolutions, but oh well! You shouldn’t ever sleep with an unsolved fight looming over you. Neither of you will get any peace or rest. So please, solve your arguments before you hit the sack. Plus, how good does makeup sex feel? Amazing, right?
• Communicate better: Promise each other to communicate better. Communication isn’t about talking as much as it is about listening to each other. So instead of listening to respond, try and listen to your partner to understand. They may be trying to tell you something with non-verbal cues too!
• No squabbling: Tell your partner what is bothering you but do not get into petty fights over issues that have no relevance. A simple ‘Babe, that’s not okay’ will do you a lot more good than picking a fight with your partner. When it’s said that the little things make all the difference, it works both for positive situations and negative ones.
  
• Be more vulnerable: It is difficult to bare your soul and all your weaknesses to anybody, even if it is your spouse. The fear of being hurt can make anyone want to hide their feelings. But you need to trust your partner a little and know that they would never willingly hurt you. So promise one another that you’ll be emotionally honest and open. Also, avoid making it a blame game by talking about your feelings in phrases like ‘I feel’ instead of ‘You made me feel like…’
• Appreciate each other: We all know the gratitude rule – the more you are thankful for, the more you find reasons to be thankful for. Try that in your relationship too. There are so many little things that your partner does for you that you should love them more for. Even if it is something as small as leaving the toilet seat down, just smile and say thank you. While it’s always easier to point out mistakes, it’s more fruitful to praise each other.
• Share responsibilities: The burden of the household chores should not fall on only one person. You’re equal in a relationship and just like you vowed to share sorrow and joy, you should share the responsibilities too. Make one another’s life simple, you guys.
• More acceptance: There is a quote that goes something like ‘I like you because and I love you despite’. This teaches you that love is all about acceptance – of each other’s flaws, shortcomings and mistakes. Love your partner for who they are, instead of trying to change them. Your aim is to love them, it is their responsibility to become a better person. So promise each other wholehearted acceptance! 

Vows To Make To Each Other’s Family & Friends

• Be more patient: Families can be a little tricky to deal with, especially your in-laws. They may not share the same views as you and may have a different way of dealing with a lot of things. But at the end of the day, they are your spouse’s family and you need to be more patient towards them. There are times we don’t agree with our own parents but that does not mean we love them any less. So promise each other to be more accepting of each other’s families.
  
• Love them like your own: Resolve this year to love your partner’s family and friends just like you love your own – unconditionally, without a question or a doubt. It’ll light up their face every time they see you do things for them.
• Plan get-togethers: Just like you promised to spend more time with each other, assure your families that you’ll spend more time with them as well. Take both sets of parents on a vacation or have a youngsters’ party every now and then where both the sets of siblings are invited. In short, guarantee them more bonding time!
• Forgive more: Sometimes, comments from your in-laws, even if they are well-meaning, can hurt you and make you feel like you aren’t a part of the family. Reach an agreement with each other to not take everything so personally. And if what they said was extremely hurtful, have an open conversation about it with them instead of holding a grudge. A New Year’s resolution like this can make your married and family life much easier.

Make A Career Pact

• Compliment each other’s work more often: Be each other’s hype man and promise yourselves that you’ll tell them you are proud of them for every achievement of theirs. Pay more attention to his presentations while he tells you how kick ass you are at your job. This is one cool resolution that will also motivate you to do much better, career-wise.
• Ask each other for advice: Your careers may be completely different and unrelated but you need to still come to one another for advice. An outsider’s perspective will help you solve your problem better and talking about each other’s jobs will help you get to know and appreciate what they do more.
  
• Enable each other’s success: As we said, you need to be an enabler in your partner’s life. There will be times when your career goals may clash but give your word to each other to always reach a compromise. In some instances, you will need to prioritize them before your career because that is the need of the hour so do it without complaints. Know that when the time comes, they’d do the same for you.
• Plan your finances better: Finances are a sore point between a lot of couples so always ensure that you sit down, have a chat and plan them to the best of your capabilities. Also, start saving a little for the future.
• Never compete with each other: Relationships are about both partners giving their 100% and not competing with each other to make sure that the other person is doing 50% of the work. So assure each other to never compete with each other or make the other feel ungrateful. Also, swear to yourselves that’ll you be happy for their success, even if you aren’t doing so well at the moment! 

Unique New Year’s Resolutions For Husband And Wife

Do Something That Neither Of You Has Done Before:

Prepare a bucket list of activities that you and your husband wanted to do for so long but haven’t been able to get around to it. It could be traveling, adventure sports or something as simple as trying out a new restaurant you’ve been meaning to eat at. Resolution or no resolution, make this year really interesting!

Break a Bad Habit Together:

Letting go of negative influences becomes such a task when you have to do it alone. But when you have a partner working with you to give up the same thing, it gets much easier. Even if it’s not the same bad habit, you can each break one together. You can try cutting down on your sugar intake while s/he reduces their alcohol intake.

Treat Each Other As Well As You Treat Your Friends:

We’re so careful with our friends, making sure we value them and are always there for them. Between friends, there is no place for judgement or anger and we end up forgiving a lot of their vices because we love them so much. It is important to do the same for your partner as well. Hold them to the same standard and treat them just like you would treat your friends.

Sweat It Out:

If either of you is finding it difficult to shed those extra kgs or tone your leg muscles, become each other’s gym buddies. This way you’re not only achieving a personal goal, but you’ll also have your biggest cheerleader supporting you through the journey, even on the toughest days.

Keep Your Partner On His/Her Toes:

You may have one of those weird telepathic connections where you usually get to know what the other person is up to but you still need to try and surprise each other more often! Even if it’s tiny things like getting your wife chocolate while coming back from work or leaving a note in their bag, it’ll be so much fun!

A Technology-Free Zone:

Technology, from our cell phones to our televisions, has become such an intricate part of our lives that we do not even realize how much time we’re wasting because of it. From Instagram to Netflix, we spend hours on our electronic devices even when we don’t want to! So try and make your bedroom a technology-free zone. Don’t have a television in there and leave your mobile on charge outside the bedroom. This will give you two the time to reconnect without the outside influences.

Revisit Your Childhood:

We’ve established that adulthood is boring and adulting is very hard. So why don’t you two promise to play a little? I’m not talking about the dirty, bedroom type of play. I’m talking about the pillow fights and tickling fest kinda play. So let go sometimes and do silly little things that bring you joy such as talking in funny voices or pranking each other. Laughing will bring you two closer like nothing else

Show Each Other Off:

Show each other off ALL. THE. TIME. Leave no chance to tell the world how awesome your partner is, how good-looking they are, how well they are doing in their career. You chose this person to be your spouse and let the world know you chose well! Also, the smile on your husband or wife’s face will be priceless.

Learn Each Other’s Love Language:

There are five types of love languages and you need to find out your partner’s. Basically, there are five different love languages: material gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch. Assess what is your partner’s love language and love them in that way, instead of loving them in your language. Doesn’t this make so much sense?

Promise Each Other Alone Time:

Most people need some ‘me’ time to recuperate and get back into the game. Be respectful of your partner’s needs and give them alone time whenever they need it. They do not need to be away from you, they just want to be by themselves so refrain from making it all about yourself.

Tell Each Other One Joke Every Day:

There’s nothing to explain in this, just make each other laugh every day. That’s the secret to a successful relationship.

Promise Each Other Nights Off:

Girls’/Boys’ nights out are not hyped enough. We all love our partners but sometimes we do want to spend some time with our friends. So promise to let each other have a night of some friendly fun without holding it against them.

How To Stick To Your New Year’s Resolution

Keep Your Resolutions Simple:

It is important to keep your resolutions basic and easy to follow. While at the start of the year, you might aim high and want a lot of self-improvement but remember that all things can’t be achieved at once. The best thing to do is choose small goals instead of big ones and aim to work towards them.

Be Careful With Your Picks:

The resolutions you pick should be your priority and have an immediate effect on your happiness. If you think that any problems in your relationship are only because you don’t spend enough time together, promise yourself that you’ll have at least two date nights every week, no matter what. Don’t add different dimensions to it and complicate it.

A Little Reality Check Helps:

You may think that you’re setting reasonable goals but life has a way of catching up with you, with all the schedules and responsibilities. So sit down, discuss and write down all your new year resolutions, what you can and cannot achieve. Also, ask yourself why you failed the last time and factor in the same to be able to achieve your goals this time around.

Take Baby Steps:

You’re not going to achieve all your goals in the first week itself. You’ll build the habit over time. So if you resolved to spend more time together this year, start out by one date night per week and then increase it gradually.

Constantly Note Down Your Progress:

Make a habit tracker for the two of you where you can note down how well you’re doing. Having physical proof of your progress is going to work as a great motivator.

Reward Yourself:

Don’t berate yourself everytime you don’t achieve something but be sure to praise each other when you do something right. Negative motivation works less than you’d think and it wouldn’t get you closer to your partner for sure!

Be Each Other’s Support System:

Keeping New Year’s resolutions is hard and that is exactly why you two need each other’s constant support. For instance, if one of you forgets a date night, the other should plan to surprise them instead of taking offense or being angry at them. Things get tough for the best of us! Lift each other up always!

Never Give Up:

Even if you fail once, don’t give up. Excuses are easy but an effort is so darn sexy! You’re doing this for each other so even if you fall off the wagon once or twice, don’t give up altogether!   

GIFs: Giphy

This story was updated in December 2019.

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