Pannalal Shakya a BJP MLA from Guna, Madhya Pradesh had a comment to make while attending an event at the Guna Government College. He said, “Why do girls make boyfriends? If they stop doing this, the atrocities against them will stop. A TV channel recently asked for my comment on atrocities against women in Madhya Pradesh. I told them what I told you just now.” First things first, women are honestly tired of being told what to do; especially by men who glamourise and justify victim-blaming in India. And so we decided to ask seven women – like you and me – to respond to the question this politician has raised – Why do girls make boyfriends?
1. He Empowers Me
When I’m going to the market and some guy catcalls me, it’s not because I have a boyfriend. When I’m out with my girls and a stranger crosses me singing, “Tu cheez badi hai mast mast,” it’s not because I have a boyfriend. When the female security guard at the metro station ‘checks’ me, it’s not because I have a boyfriend. If having a boyfriend is the reason for all these “atrocities,” then why was all this still happening when I didn’t have one? TBH, having a boyfriend makes me feel more safe, secure and empowered. That statement, Dear Sir, is an atrocity to me.
– Sayunkta Jain, Senior Fashion Writer
2. Sex Is Good
I want to have a boyfriend for a lot of reasons and one of them is… SEX. Yep, you read it right. I am an Indian woman who enjoys having sex. It relieves me of stress and keeps me happy and so does my boyfriend. (Always with consent, of course!)
– Isheeta Sharma, Junior Lifestyle Editor, POPxo
3. For An Intimate Companionship
Having a boyfriend – or any kind of romantic relationship, for that matter – has to do with companionship – the idea of having this one person to turn to at the end of the day, no matter who walks out or what goes wrong. There’s a beauty to an intimate relationship that you share with just this one person who knows your soul better than you know the back of your hand and vice versa. It’s about being in a relationship of equality, respect and mutual understanding that goes beyond just friendships and familial ties.
– Dessidre Fleming, Lifestyle Editor, POPxo
4. Let’s Cover The Basics
Do you know how hard it is to find a boy through the arranged marriage setup? Well, I do! Even my parents wish I was dating somebody to save them the hassle of looking for one. Also, there are only about so many reasons to have a boyfriend and one of them is LOVE. I think that’s about it.
– Srishti Gupta, Senior Lifestyle Writer, POPxo
5. My Choice, My Right
It’s called ‘doing whatever the heck I want because I have rights as a citizen’. I have a boyfriend because I CAN have one, and I’m not breaking any law by being in a relationship with a human being. If having a boyfriend is why atrocities are being committed against women, how do you explain young girls and babies being harmed by the perpetrators? Maybe leaders should keep looking for excuses to not take action for women’s safety because this one doesn’t cut it.
– Nancy Varghese, Travel Writer
6. He Helps Me Deal With Everyday Bullsh*t
I don’t want a guy to pamper me or treat me like a princess, but I want a boyfriend so that I have someone to share everything with – the events of my day, my problems, things that make me happy, things that upset me, my bucket list etc. etc. I want him for those intimate kisses, for the crazy sex and for the adorable cuddling afterward. Sounds cliche, but so what! In fact, my boyfriend is not the reason for the ‘atrocities’ that I face every day, but he’s definitely the one who helps me deal with the bullsh*t that the society keeps throwing my way, every other day.
– Manvi Malhotra, Senior Wedding Writer
7. Because This World Needs Love
Life is hard enough as it is, I like having someone around who makes it easy to deal with the crap in this world. This statement just being one of those things. BRB, gonna share this article with him. But on a serious note, there is so much love to give, why should we keep it to ourselves? Share it, find that guy or girl you love and relationship him/her immediately!
– Akanksha Bhatia, Lifestyle Writer