Going to the parlour to affirm our femininity is a universal concept. But here in India, we have this phenomenon known as the ‘parlour didi’. And boy, can she be a handful! Any Indian girl who’s *ever* stepped into a parlour will vouch for all of this to be true. Here are 11 things we want the parlour didi should stop doing!
1. We wish for once that she wouldn’t look at us and exclaim – ‘Haaye yeh kya haal bana rakha hai?’
Firstly didi, this is the hot mess look and it’s in. Secondly, I have no clue what you’re exactly referring to!
2. We wish she wouldn’t talk to us at the chosen decibel so all the other ladies in the parlour can hear all about our hair woes!
Parlour didi, I’m right here, next to you! Zara dheere, please?
3. We wish that when we go in asking for eyebrow threading, she wouldn’t ask about upper lips!
Nahin, I don’t want to get my upper lips done. I never get my upper lips done. Please don’t make me conscious!
4. We wish she wouldn’t ask us aloud and in a tone dripping with judgement if we want to get that bikini wax after all.
Sex is normal parlour didi! And so is hygiene. Please get with the program!
5. We wish she wouldn’t touch our hair for a nanosecond and immediately comment on its dryness!
Dear parlour didi, we know you are about to recommend that expensive AF hair mask treatment!
6. We wish she would stop talking while we are getting that relaxing cleanup!
No, I don’t want to know what Dolly aunty said to you the other day. (Okay, maybe I do – but not right now!)
7. We wish she would stop recommending random things to us all the time!
But I don’t want chocolate wax! I don’t care how my wax tastes. Just do the damn thing at minimum cost possible!
8. We wish she’d stop comparing us (and our hair growth) to all other young girls who come to the parlour.
Really! Why do you do that?! It doesn’t make any sense!
9. We wish she wouldn’t make it her mission to ask us about our man hunt!
No, didi! Koi acha ladka nahin mila abh tak. Don’t worry I’ll tell you when it happens! *Sigh*
10. We mainly wish she’d listen to us when we say don’t pluck out all our eyebrows!
I NEED MY EYEBROWS TO BE ON FLEEK DIDI! *Insert death stare here*
11. We wish she would stop quoting different rates each time!
But… But… I’m your regular customer! *Insert major feelings of betrayal here*